New Girl

So New Girl  has had its second flashback episode (now it's time to do an Alternate Universe/what if? episode!) How did the recent "Clavado En Un Bar" stack up against last season's "Virgins?"
Winston
Well, I had high hopes when I saw the promo images of Winston's whimsical leopard-dyed hair, but his basketball story didn't quite deliver. It had trademark Winston-delusion (he called his career-ending injury a "decision"), but there's no way it could beat the story of his tryst with Mysteria.
Clavado En Un Bar: 0, Virgins: 1
Schmidt
Schmidt started as a candy striper (or, as Nick lovingly referred to "a 300 pound wall of peppermint bark"), but realized volunteering wasn't the way to get girls. So he began selling Christmas trees – and not long after, a Christmas tree mogul happened to die on his watch, and his last words? "You can take it with you." Together, these two experiences lead Schmidt to become the materialistic man he is today.
A charmingly Schmidt-appropriate tale, but his lube disaster with Elizabeth had more panache (and quite a bit more physical comedy).
Clavado En Un Bar: 0, Virgins: 2
Coach
Coach had less of a story: he yelled advice from the sidelines of a basketball court so well that he earned his nickname. As he sagely puts it, "Sometimes, the call comes from inside the house."
By default: Clavado En Un Bar: 1, Virgins: 2
Nick
We catch our first glimpse of Law School Nick: he transforms from Dreadlock Nick to Super Preppy Nick (preppy to the point that Schmidt compliments his scarf). Eventually, he finds himself studying at the bar – when the bartender literally falls asleep on the job, he realizes he's found his calling.